Monday, August 27, 2012

to brush my teeth...


as far as anxiety and depression have it, mine has lessened quite a bit.

i'm pretty sure we can attribute this to the fact that i'm no longer in a job i'm dramatically underqualified for, and being taken advantage of by those who hired me.

i'm in a better place.

that still doesn't mean i'm particularly happy with life right now.  but its a less panicky kind of unhappiness.  the kind thats a little too comfortable, like that pair of shoes that you keep wearing, despite the fact that you have tons of other really cute shoes you could be wearing, and would prefer to be wearing.  this pair is just really convenient to slip on when you're running out of the house, and they match what you've got on...most of the time.

i've been combatting this by actually trying to do productive things.  most days i'm not productive, but i try.  for instance, right before gencon i finally set up a much needed dentist appointment.  its september seventh if you wanted to know...i'm excited about it.

basically, now is the perfect time for me to actually start doing all of the things i've been trying to start for a while now.  i can start exercising, and i cna find a job that fits me.  i can restart my old hobbies.  the problem is that i am out of practice of all of these things, and if there is one thing i am bad at, it is starting new habits.

i'm bad at habit forming

especially when my life is currently void of routine enforcing acticities (you know like school or work, the things you wake up in the morning to do)

i need a reason to wake up in the morning...

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